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David Letterman Jokes About Jihadist Threat In First Show Back

David Letterman returned to the 'Late Show' last night and joked about the death threat against him on an extremist website.

"We have a great audience night in and night out but tonight you mean a lot to me," began Letterman.

"You people are more, honestly, than an audience to me tonight, really. You're more like a human shield."

"I'm so sorry, I'm a little late coming out. Backstage, I was talking to the guy from CBS. We were going through the CBS life insurance policy to see if I was covered for jihad," he joked.

"You're not going to believe what happened. A guy, a radical extremist, threatened to cut my tongue out. I wish I had a nickel for every time a guy has threatened... I think the first time was during the Academy Awards."

"I have a fatwa on me. And they say the guy that issued the fatwa is an Internet jihadist. Internet jihadist, and I said, 'Well, heck, who says Obama isn't creating jobs?'"

"And so now, State Department authorities are looking into this. They're not taking this lightly. They're looking into it."

"They're questioning, they're interrogating, there's an electronic trail but everybody knows it's Leno."

Letterman even made the story the focus of his 'Top Ten Thoughts That Went Through My Mind After Hearing about the Threat.'

A list that included gems like "Why is the staff in such a good mood?", "How can someone be so angry at a time when Kim Kardashian (photosKim Kardashian photos) is so happy?" and "Some people get Emmy nominations; some people get death threats."

The extremist poster, who went by the name Umar al-Basrawi, wrote last week: "Is there not amongst you a Sayyid Nosair al-Masri (may Allah less him) to cut the tongue of this lowly Jew and shut it forever. Just as Sayyid (may Allah less him) did with the Jew Kahane."

Check out a compilation of some of the jokes below:

August 23, 2011 |

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